A major mistake to avoid when you're trying to get your ex-girlfriend, fiancé, or wife back is to turn into an emotional wussy.
The more of an emotional wuss that a guy becomes, the more it annoys the woman because women are not attracted to the emotional weakness of men.
Women are not attracted to emotional weakness
Women are always attracted to the emotional strength of men. For example: Confidence, self-belief, high self-esteem, self-assurance, determination to succeed, etc.
So, if a guy is displaying emotional, wussy behavior where he's being insecure, emotionally sensitive, appears to be lost without her and is also afraid to joke around because he's worried that it might upset her, that is going to turn her off.
Fix your emotional issues first, otherwise she will continue to feel turned off
When going through a breakup, what a woman positively responds to is when a man is confident in himself and he doesn't stop being his real self. He doesn't lose confidence in his ability to make her feel attracted.
He also doesn't feel like it's no longer his place to joke around with her, and flirt with her, and make her feel attracted. It is his place because he is a confident, loving man and he can make her feel attracted, and he can also make other women feel attracted.
He might not want other women because he wants her, but if he wanted to have other women, he could because he's a confident, loving man who knows how to attract women.
Using Humor Rather Than Being an Emotional Wuss
One of the best ways to show your ex that you're not emotionally weak, is to have the balls to joke around in moments where you would usually just be polite, nice and essentially suck up to her.
For example: A guy is talking to his woman and she says, "I don't have feelings for you anymore." He can joke around with her at that point, and get her laughing and smiling, which is going to make her feel some attraction and respect for him.
So in response to her saying, "I don't know if I have feelings for you anymore." He can then smile and say in a joking manner, "Yeah, me too. I hate you now. You're my bitchy ex-girlfriend who broke my heart. Oh, I'm going to cry now."
She's most-likely going to laugh and smile in that moment.
Important: Saying that to her isn't the magic secret to getting an ex back; it's just something in that moment that's at least going to make her smile and maybe even make her laugh. It's also going to make her feel respect for the fact that the guy isn't losing confidence regardless of what she says.
He maintain his confidence in his ability to make her feel attracted.
He knows that by getting her laughing and smiling like that, in a moment where she's not really feeling sure about her feelings, is going to make her have some feelings for him.
Show her your emotional strength at all times
She's going to feel good around him, she's going to be laughing and smiling, which is going to mean that she has some feelings for him.
He knows that he can create that.
When you know that you can create attraction inside of a woman, you've got nothing to worry about.
Whatever she says to you, you can use it as an opportunity to make her feel respect and attraction for you.
If you are sincere about wanting to get your ex back, you need to use every interaction, whether that's via text, on a phone call, or in person as an opportunity to make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
When you approach it in that way, she will drop her guard, begin to have feelings for you again, and become open to meeting up and experiencing the new and improved version of you in person.
When you meet up and make her feel a lot of respect and attraction, she'll most likely be open to hooking up again and giving the relationship another chance.
Getting an ex back is easier when you focus on making her feel attracted to you, rather than wasting months ignoring her or wasting loads of energy on endless phone calls where you're trying to convince her to give you another chance.
In most cases, a woman is only going to give a guy another chance if he has the ability to make her have feelings for him again.
You can make her have feelings for you in many different ways. One of those ways is getting her laughing and smiling and another way is to show her that you've moved beyond the level that you were at when she broke up with you.
For example: If a guy got broken up with because he didn't have much purpose in life, he didn't have much ambition. He was just sitting around, or working in a crappy job, or wanting to spend most of his time with her and just clinging on to her.
What's going to make her have some feelings for him again (it's not going to be the ultimate solution to getting her back, but it's going to make her have some feelings for him again), is to see that he now has big goals in life and he's starting to make some progress towards that.
That is what really counts.
It's about making her have some feelings for you again, allowing her to smile and laugh when she's interacting with you, allowing her to look at you in a new, positive light and see that you have begun to move beyond the level that you were at when she broke up with you.
You don't have to become perfect though, you don't have to fix everything and become a super, amazing man to get an ex back.
It's actually a lot simpler than that.
Another example of getting her smiling, and maybe even laughing, is where she asks, "Is it still cool to contact you? Do you want to stay friends?" and then the guy can respond to that in a way that makes her laugh.
So with the example of her asking, "Is it still cool to contact you?" A guy can then say, "No way. Don't ever contact me again, I never want to hear from you. Why would I want to hear from you? If you call me, I'm hanging up right away. I'm just, like, end phone call, every time."
At that moment, she's going to be able to smile, she's going to be able to feel some respect for him that he is confident and he's in control in that situation.
Compare that to a guy who responds to her question of, "Is it still cool to contact you?" with "Of course, contact me any time," or even worse where he says, "No, don't contact me again. I won't be able to handle that. If you don't want to be with me, then don't contact me. I can't deal with that, it's going to be too painful," and then she loses respect for him for being an emotional wuss.
With the other example of her asking, "Do you still want to be friends?" a guy can also use that as an opportunity to get her smiling and maybe even laughing.
She asks, "Do you still want to be friends?" A guy can say, "Yeah, we'll be best friends. We'll go shopping on Sundays, we'll gossip on Mondays, and we'll text like crazy during the week about all the TV shows that we're watching. We'll be best friends forever."
In that moment, she's going to be able to smile and she might even laugh. More importantly, she is going to be able to feel some respect for him and isn't going to be looking down on him for being an emotional wuss like or lacking the confidence and balls to joke around with her.
On the other hand, if a woman asks that question, "Do you still want to be friends?" Her boyfriend, fiancé, or husband says, "No, no, no, I don't want to be friends. If you don't want to be with me, then I don't want to be interacting with you. It'd be too painful, etc."
That's not going to make her feel respect and attraction for him in that moment.
She's going to feel as though he's not emotionally strong, he can't even deal with what's going on and it's going to make her lose even more respect and attraction for him.